Mar 1, 2010

Day One NYC or why You could get killed riding a train to Brooklyn

We started our journey at the famous Waldorf Astoria. While it is a beautiful place save your money because nothing cheap in this joint. The room was nice but it looked directly at another row of windows so seemed very Rear Windowish.. Thank God for binoculars!

The part that got our goat so to speak was " The Continental Breakfast"...
First off some asian guy said " You sit here" in that oh soo Manhattan tone of get out of here you redneck piece of swine. "The Breakfast" consisted of random muffins, pastries, cheese and fruit. Nothing spectacular.. You know regular shit. We were self pleased and sastiated with their offerings until the bill came...

$89.00 Motherf*^ing dollars. Welcome to the Waldorf you texan retards. Enjoy your soon to be poverty..
<----- This now what I think of the Waldork Astoria Extortionist Pigs. Hope I clogged your plumbing.

We then wandered Central park which is heaven in the middle of chaos. The views are simply breathtaking and until you see it with your own eyes you cannot understand the magic that it is. For once I was pretty speechless. For a moment.

I found the New York Public Library across the way and had to have a look. The arcitecture alone draws me in like a pee brained moth to the flame. I was not disappointed. The attention paid to every detail was simply amazing. They certainly do not care about craftsmanship anymore. It was then I started to understand the magnitude of this city.

Deciding we were really hot shit here we decided to brave the subway system. This is why tourists get killed in Harlem. We hoped on what we thought was the train to Coney Island. The farther we got on it we realized the error of our ways. The crowd got rougher and rougher looking until finally we were the looking like a couple of white targets. When the looks start looking at your cameras and purses, the sweats set in. At Euclid ave, in central Brooklyn we got off the sub and turned our happy asses around and headed back uptown. Which turns out to really look safe after surviving the Euclid Deathtrap. Were's my fuggin' t-shirt?

Almost dying built a substantial hunger so we found a great spot for Bar B-Que called Dave Brown's Steak House. They have a sauce called Devils Brew. It was not an exaggeration, but extremely worthy of suffering the fall out that comes they next time you use the can..


Jay said...

Sometimes the most fun you can have visiting a place is to get lost and end up in the more dangerous area of town. Or do like me and "accidentally" end up in an area of San Francisco full of strip clubs. :-)

Also, never go to NY on a really tight budget. You won't have any fun. It costs a fortune to visit.

Blancodeviosa said...

ha jay! i am quite sure you end up in hooter heaven completely innocently ;)
good job.
we saw a few good places to take in titties, unfortunetly to fuggin tired to care..

cathy said...

I did a stint ona ship sailing out of new york. It was too big and mucky and noisy for my liking but The steakhouses I visited were good.

Blancodeviosa said...

i really enjoyed it cathy but was defintely tired of all the honking and starey type people. all in all tho what a damn adventure