Jul 31, 2007

Bound and Tagged

tagged by al, here's a little bit about yours truly~

1. What's your signature dish when cooking?

i am not sure if i have a signature dish. i can cook fairly well, but it's mostly italian pasta dishes. i always change them up though because i never follow recipes. i think my chicken marsala is pretty good

2. If you had a time machine, but only the ability to jump forward or back 5 times, where would you go in time and why?

this is hard. personally i would go back to the 80's and fix my damn hair.
politically, the viet-nam era would be interesting to see. i would be down there on the line protesting and getting locked up. or maybe the 30's or 40's in the dawn of "talkies" when movies meant something. i would say a futuristic adventure, but i am scared of what i might see there.

3. What's the most attractive feature, physical or otherwise in a person?

looks haven't really ever mattered to me. i like kind eyes, a nice smile and a wicked sense of humor.

4. When at high school, what did you want to be when you grew up?

i have always wanted to be a nurse. i like to help people. instead i became a desk jockey. life is ironic.

5. Where in the world are your 5 all time favourite places and what makes them so special?

there is a little pond in arizona that reminds me of a mythical forest. i absolutely feel at peace there.
the places i really want to see though are all in europe. the states seem pretty dead to me.

for this one i am tagging jay, pauline, what a crock, captain corky and etain. here's your 5! ~

1. Where do you picture yourself in 5 years and why?-
2. What is your favorite memory of childhood?-
3. If you could choose your parents, would you change?-
4. Do you think we just exist or do we have a specific purpose?-
5. If you could live anywhere, where would it be and why?-

Potatoes and Mormons

Yes, there alot of them here. Not that I have a problem with potatoes or freakishly smiling people eager to help you see your evil ways.

speaking of, i need some coffee

i in fact am having a wonderful time with my family. we have gone to see the sites and caught up with old times. even grandma seems more chipper with the bestest grand daughter around. it's been a blur of activities and insane antiquing.

i make it insane by gawd!!

i will be home soon, so all 7 of you can get ready for that. i will fill you all in later on details and pictures. and remember- grandma always said there was a reason women shouldn't eat too many onions.

I've learned my lesson..

Jul 23, 2007

Boredom Sets In When It Storms All Weekend Long...

Stoopid rain, I could be sunbathing...

Sadie gives me kisses

Just a "Dog Bed" to them
Photos by Macguffin

Jul 19, 2007


She was all things mysterious and beautiful


1st Poloroid made

This one reminds me of a spy camera

1900's accordian style

These are a few of the cameras I have picked up during our travels. They remind me of simpler times. I often wonder who had them, where they have been and what memories they've captured..

Jul 18, 2007

Thank you Top Cat, a wonderful blogger who always makes you smile, has a kind word and tolerates us weirdos with finesse. You are a great blogger!!

I would like to nominate~
1. Macguffin. New to writing his own blog, but he does a great job. He has such style and taste. You deserve much more my love and best friend.

2.Pookie. She gets busy and says she struggles to keep up her blog, but I don't believe it. She always has something witty to say and makes me laugh so hard I pee a little. I miss ya girly ;)

3. What a Crock. What can I say about this girl. Through all the struggles in life she maintains her composure and always comes up swinging. You have a killer wit Mon Chi Chi and your friggin Hawt!

4. Cathy. This lady can spin a chilling tale in 55 words. I am in awe of her. Thank you for letting me be a part of it.

5.Jay. What can I say... you always make me laugh so hard, well I pee a little. You see a pattern here? Such sarcastic wit and he gets the best hatemail!!! You have the gift my friend.

6. Eric313. This man is destined to be famous. His writing is always unique and chilling. I have no idea where he comes up with these poems but his writing is magnificent.

Jul 16, 2007

Lullaby~ pt.2

She looked like an angel. These are the only words I can use to describe her. Flowing locks of golden hair, the fairest skin I had ever seen and eyes so blue I thought the sky had swallowed me up. As if I was sitting upon a billowy cloud gazing out upon a beautiful turquoise ocean. Her garbs were long and white.They flowed out in a circular pattern around her.
"You aren't exactly what I pictured" I say, shuffling my foot nervously side to side. I've seen horror movies. People eating mutants always jump out of beings like this.
She says nothing. Instead she motions me to follow her. Standing still I watch her walk away. Not like steps but gliding along as if she were floating. Perhaps she was. Again she motions me to follow her even though she never turned around to see if I were following her or not.
"What the hell", I mutter to myself and run to catch up to her.

We must been walking a good hour. I am beginning to wonder if I will ever see my own bed again. This nightmare seems to have devoured my reality. Maybe there never was a reality and I had just manufactured it in my head? A cold shiver goes up my spine. I shove my hands back into my pockets in a vain attempt to find a bit of warmth.

I was so lost in my thoughts, I nearly ran over the angelic being not realizing she had stopped. Abruptly she grabs my arm with mightily force and pushes me to my knees. I realize I am on the edge of a bank over looking a small pond. The water is remarkably still. It too has that strange opalesque hue to it. I can see my face in blue, green and pink tones.

When she speaks, I nearly jump out of my skin. "Look closely" I hear in a very soothing voice. Like ice cream covered in rich chocolate syrup.If her voice were a delectable treat, that's what it would be. Pointing down at the water, she says again "Look closely into the reflection". What I see is horrific.

This monster I see is hideous. Snarling, vicious hideous creature. It is chewing through the bones of small children. No remorse, no empathy, the underlying end of humanity. I can see this creature has no pity. What I see isn't a clearly animated demonic entity, but of something different. With eyes, I have seen all my life. Every day, every waking moment,a face I have gazed upon every time I've looked into the mirror. Chewing up and spitting out all that dare to glance in it's direction. At that moment in her soft eyes, as if it had hit me with two tons of force. I realized the error of my ways...

Jul 13, 2007


I started this story in October and never finished it. This is the weekend I will. Procastination be gone! POOF

The rain was cold. It felt like ice coming down in heavy droplets. I am not sure how I got here or why. I sit here under this tree's canopy and wait for the rain to die down. Minutes turn to hours and I sit rocking rythmically back and forth. Above me I hear almost inaudible whispers. They are drawing closer. I 'm too scared to look up. It is getting dark and I seemed to have stepped out of reality. I brace myself because I have an uncanny feeling the other shoe is about to drop. Then quiet.. The rain has stopped. It has formed odd colored puddles around my feet. It has a peculiar odor too. I look off into the distance but a fog has formed clouding the perimeter. I has a strange beauty to it though,even if the trees have strange tenticle looking things. I begin to feel my way out from under this umbrella of trees. Out of the quiet a voice emerges. It hisses and crackles and I jump back. I feel stupid when I realize it is a crow. He is jet black with piercing yellowish green eyes, and why wouldn't he? I have stepped into hell I think to myself. He lands on a branch above my head and "You" he says in a hushed tone. "You are evil" he continues when he see's I am listening. "You will perish this night". He is chuckling too himself now. Oh yeah Ah Ha Ha, I think. "stupid bird" I mutter. " I know you" he says in a very irritated tone now. "You cannot save yourself" he says almost laughing hysterically now. I am still trying to figure it all out when he continues, "Travel to the top of the hill". He stops. I fidget with my ever tightening collar. "Yes" I say, I really want to get this over with. It almost seems as though he smiles. "Throw yourself to the creature who dwells there in the shadows. He laughs again. "She will almost certainly EAT you". His laughter now is a shrill high pitched diabolical laughter that pains my ears. Suddenly he flies straight up and is gone.

I knew I had to get out of here. I just didn't know where? I step out from under the tree timidly. Baby steps, I tell myself summoning what courage I don't have. I tip toe to avoid the opalesque colored puddles left from the down pour, following a path that lead directly into the fog. It has to lead somewhere I think to myself and keep stepping. The terrain is rocky and covered with mossy roots. I loose my footing and the next thing I remember is rolling down a revene. I am unable to grasp anything on the way down. Just as I plunge over the edge I grab a thick root or vine. I keep clawing my way up the slimy pole. I couldn't tell you what was below me. I didn't stick around to find out. I continue to grasp at anything that resembled solid ground, until I could swing my foot up onto the edge and get the hell outta there. I look down wincing at the gurgling, bubbling bog. Damn that was close. A cold shiver overcomes me and my breath is visibly colder now. I am panicked now, I don't mind telling you fine people. My teeth are clattering and I realize it is raining again. I pull the sleeves of my torn and tattered jacket as far over my hands as I can. The rain feels sort of acidic and and burns stightly on my face. I duck under a patch of scrub brush and wait again. This time I realize suddenly that I am not alone. I have indeed come face to face with the creature the bird foretold.

To be continued...

Jul 12, 2007

Fuck My Phone (Pushing for the NC17)

I am an idiot.
Yes, you know this already.
I am running around making all these cute videos of the three other people in my life and of course the real reason for my existence, my dogs. But NO. My Phone Won't Let Me Send A Video With More Than 300k...
So, there goes MY new movie (Rape Phone, The phone that rapes people)Thanks P. Oswalt!

I better learn how to make some 3 second kick ass videos in a hurry because apparently that is all the time I get.

Pardon the vulgarity of this post. I woke up a Sailor this morning.

Jul 11, 2007

Amazing Ads of Yester Year


Yes Amazing!!

See healthy ???

So is my Chihuahua

That's my Motto!

Lysol??!! Sweet..

Even Santa knows

Where do I get one of these??

That always works fellas

Jul 10, 2007

Have You Ever Wanted a Banana This Bad?

Did you know we put turtle crack in these bananas?
Click to enlarge and see~

I Knew This Already

Smurf Name

Your Smurf Name is
Evil Smurf
Get Your Smurf Name at Quizopolis.com


Jul 9, 2007

Meme at the Mulberry tree

1. Every time I say that I am not going to eat ice cream, I eat an entire pint. Then I puke because I am lactose intolerant
2. I can still put my legs behind my head, but I fear snapping one of my legs off now, so I rarely try. I am comforted knowing I still can
3, I have not overcome my fear of jello
4. Every time I see a butterfly, I have to fight the urge to follow it.
5. I hate listening to rap. My daughter subjects me too it. I want to jump out of the car even if I am driving
6. I REALLY hate rap. Just thought I would mention that
7. Hell will freeze over before I like rap
8. YOUR TURN .What do you THINK you know about me?

Since everyone I know has probably already done this, I will leave it up to you. If you haven't knock yourself out

Jul 6, 2007

It's A Poem

a long string of broken promises
a lack luster frame of mind
a sallow empathetic heart
and the void of empty longing
everlasting love is gained and lost
too many hardships befall it
broken pieces of the puzzle
the shattered bathroom mirror
some needed space and solitude
to expel these crazy thoughts
submerse my mind in exultation
bring forth to me the helmsman
to guide me safely home

I wrote this poem a long time ago before I met Macguffin. I rarely wrote anything so I was very surprised to find it after all these years.

Jul 5, 2007


Before you say ewww..., shriek and run away enlarge and look closely at the detail on these little guys.
Enlarge them, it's really cool I promise
The one in the middle was so small he could barely seen by the naked eye.
I just thought I would share because they hang out with me nearly everynight.

Jul 3, 2007


"Damn, those mosquitos really ate me up"!

" I got a Mosquito bite last month, but it never itched"

"That's because when it bite you, it realized you weren't really alive"


I feel the love

Jul 2, 2007


Case in point. This is why you will never see my old decrepit ass on one of these!
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Murphy's Law

If your air conditioner goes out, it will be on Friday afternoon. So we spent the weekend sweating and bitching. I called the heating and air conditioning douchebags this morning to get it will be late this afternoon or tomorrow which translates to Thursday. If the unit is indeed defunct, there is no telling when we will get this fixed.
Why do these things always happen when it is as hot as satan's asshole in your house and cooler outside?
It's rhetorical. Don't give me encouragement.
Maybe this isn't the best time to stop taking my Premarin.