Jun 22, 2007

I tried dancing to deathmetal once. It hurt

One of our barstools broke. I am not torn up about this I must confess. They haven't really been my thing. Macguffin bought them when he retired some he have pilfered from his mom's house. They are really modern and retro. I like the style, I just didn't think it suited our house. Macguffin and I differed on this opinion, but I didn't try to completely poo- poo his buy either.
But.... when one became to gimpy to sit on, I wasn't actually heart broken :)
Anyways, I digress. Macguffin decided to buy some new stools that I liked from the potterybarn. He wanted to call his potterybarn card and check his account balance and of course got the automated bitch that doesn't recognize language.
The next thing I know, I hear him yelling "I PUSHED (1) POR FAVOR"!!!!!!
and having a nervous breakdown because this bitch won't give him what he's asking for.
Finally he gets to the right menu and hangs up the phone.
God bless modern technology! We got the stools ordered. YAY!

Boo also had a doctor's appointment today so then I rushed off to do that. While were in the waiting room, I excuse me myself to the restroom. When I come back, I have 3 missed calls. The funny thing is, is they're from What a Crock. So I call her back and she answers first ring. She asks me "Were you at"? "I am in Texas, where are you"?
Puzzled for a second, she then realizes her mistake. "OH, shit. I called the wrong Danielle"...
We laughed and she said well "I guess you can't give me a ride to work"!
Sorry Crocky... I had to give you hell. You know I lub ya! ;*O
Then, I go back to waiting for this damn doctor. We wait 2 hours and finally he calls us back. We wait another 30 minutes in his office. He comes in all smiling, cracking jokes that were not the least bit funny."I haven't had a pretty girl in here for 672 days, hahaha". Bleh...
We ruined his day shortly there after when Boo refused to get a pap smear from him. He got pissy, and huffed off somewhere so that we could vacate his office. What a douche..
I guess he doesn't understand modest 15 year olds. Or maybe there isn't such a thing anymore? Feeling kind of bad for her embarrasment I took her to her favorite chinese restaurant for some killer fried rice.

Boo's fortune of the day- "Don't kiss an elephant on the lips today"

When do you kiss an elephant on the lips any day?
Who makes up this crap?
Well, I am off to work, to stare at my desk. Or perhaps to get some writing done. I am trying to move this block. Perhaps if even a little.

12 comments:

In Ink said...

Always, and I stress ALWAYS, exercise caution when kissing an elephant on the lips. Trust me on this and no, I don't want to talk about it.

Blancodeviosa said...

michael- ahahaha.. awe come on now :)

MacGuffin said...

Perhaps people in India? The Dr. sounds like a compelete tool. "Oh, what a pretty girl we have here!" Inference- He can't wait to look at her privates. Fucking creepy.

Nikki Neurotic said...

Barstools kind of freak me out.

My sis's name is Danielle...

captain corky said...

The doctor seems like a real dipshit. He can't understand the feelings of a 15 year old girl? What an ass!

I could use some killer Chinese food. Louisville doesn't have any

Jay said...

The key to kissing an elephant is to move slowly. Take your time and be really suave and sweet talk her first. You know, some mood music and maybe a glass or two of wine. Well, actually for an elephant where talking a few gallon buckets of wine, but you get the idea.

eric1313 said...

Love the title. You could have worked a slam dance into one of the lines! Metaphoric mosh pit.
Have fun and let the sentances stand, keep writing and let it all get sorted out later.

Mike Minzes said...

Great post!! I love the title!!

Big Pissy said...

My daughters both went to a female doctor at that age.

They just felt more comfortable.

The doc you went to sounds like an ass.

Blancodeviosa said...

macguffin- me not her. but yes creepy non the less

silver- a phobia?

corky- well said. really? well not all chinese people can cook :O

eric- no, i will pass on the mosh this time

mike m- thanks dude

pissy- i think it's best. and yes he is an ass. i don't know how hw stays in business. oh wait i know.

Anonymous said...

I hate when they keep you locked in that small room and you wait and wait and wait.
Sorry boo had such a poophead Dr.
tc

Blancodeviosa said...

cat- yep. dr.s time is precious. ours is expendable. that is how it goes.